"The spring before last, I came to Iran for the first time after decades of absence and longing and nostalgia and homesickness. As a hyphenated person, an Iranian-American, being neither nor either or very rarely being both at least rarely comfortably so, I arrived before dawn on pins and needles and with my whole and heart and soul and being in an state of elation mixed with anxiety and anticipation. I was pining to feel at home, and harbored notions of being like a captured fish finally returned to its native stream. Swim, swim, little fish, hyphenated no more. But I arrived with a Lonely Planet Guidebook to Iran in my suitcase - the absurdity of returning to my very own homeland with a foreign guidebook didn't escape my notice -- and while I speak Farsi fluently, I was shocked to hear from various people that I speak my own mother tongue with an accent ... and everyone knew I was a "Khareji" before I even opened my mouth. I was confounded by the currency (100 toman was a lot of money when I left and now it couldn't even buy a piece of gum) and I didn't know better than to ask for 250 grams of Chaghaleh Badoom instead of one entire kiloo. "No one ever buys that much Chaghaleh Badoom" my friends chided me with bemusement. But how could I be a Khareji when I was born here and spent the first 15 years of my life here? When my grandparents are buried here and when I find nothing more pleasing than the sound of water in the Joob or the sight of snow peaked mountains or that unique smell of Iranian earth dampened by rain? When the sight and sound of the crows brightens up my day, when I'm tickled pink by Ta'rof (at least when it's not exaggerated) and when if given the opportunity, I can write epic essays about every minute and grand facet of our enchanting and beautiful culture?
I came back to Iran again very recently. For a number of reasons. One of which was to come to my mom's art show and in this photo here I am standing in front of one of her handmade quilts. But the foremost reason I came back is that I was born in Tehran, Iran. I am a Tehrani. I don't want to be here as a Khareji or a visitor. I want to be one of the humans of Tehran. My heart is here. I want to stay here for awhile. This here is my Vatan. I'm in love and this here is my beloved."
Azita. Seen at the Haftsamar Gallery
my love in farsi 在 Farsi / Persian Lesson: Love Words (39) - YouTube 的美食出口停車場
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