關於 how to love your rebellious child ，我們在網路上蒐集到這些相關的討論、資訊與評價

Bila Ibu kita sudah tua.

Ibu kita ini sering kesunyian. Ibu sering ketakutan. Ibu sering dilanda kerinduan. Dahulunya hidup si Ibu bertemankan suaminya yang dicintai. Kini teman sehidupnya telah lama pergi. Janji semati tidak mampu lagi ditepati. Tinggallah si Ibu sendirian meniti hari.

Jika kita letak diri di tempat Ibu sebegini, mampukah kita menjawab soalan - soalan yang bermain di fikirannya? Dapatkah kita mendengar bisikan hatinya tanpa menitiskan sedikit pun air mata?
...Continue ReadingWhen our mother is old.

Our mother is often lonely. Moms are often scared. Mother is often affected by longing. Once a mother lived with her beloved husband. Now friends in life are long gone. The promise of the life is no longer able to be fulfilled. Leave the Mother alone on the day.

If we put ourselves in a mother's place like this, can we answer the questions that play on her mind? Can we hear the whisper of his heart without shed a little tear?

Well, feel some of what's playing on our Moms mind.

′′ My husband, why did you go first? Why leave love alone? My husband, dear miss, how do you love to live this life? Baby is scared, love is quiet. Love can't live alone. Please return my husband. Unusual love. We always do everything together. Why go first? What do you want to do? Baby is so scared."

At the time and time I type the verse in the paragraph above, I literally cry desperately - esak like a child. That's just a little bit actually. Can't afford to dive any deeper. My heart feels so small as squeezed - pinch being as small as a guli. The eyes are heavy looking, the shoulder is still heavy.

Don't be reprimanded why Mom always remember what the late Father likes and does together often. Dozens of years, there must be things that will be attached to Mom's mind forever. Surely every one that has been touched, will be felt, every happiness that has been fulfilled, will be remembered.

Don't dare talk about ′′ move on ′′ and life must go on. If we have never felt the loss of a friend who has been together for decades, we will never ever understand the longing and loss that Mother has passed until we go through it ourselves.

Don't you rudely suggest a replacement. Mom already knows who's waiting for her in heaven later. The most loved person is the husband.

Our mother is often misunderstood. Usually Mom doesn't mean what we interpret. Sometimes Mom is too honest because she's been tired all the time holding back, taking care of her heart and always ignoring her sensitivity.

We as younger, we as children must be patient. Although sometimes it's bitter to swallow, but we have to accept the way our Mother is as Mom has accepted us since we were young.

How can we not stand the burden of mother while this Mother is the one who gave birth to us? How can we raise our voice to the people who introduced us to the world? If you ever treated a mother like this, don't you remember sin, a rebellious child?

When was the last time we asked our Mother what our Mother wanted to do? If there is, try to realise it. If you haven't, make it as soon as possible. We don't know maybe it's his last desire or maybe that realised desire will give him the spirit to live for years.

At this age, Mom likes to tell stories. Sometimes the same thing. Surely most of the old things. Pay attention to him. Enjoy the conversation and the sharing. That's all that's left in Mom's mind, past things. Memory of a million color life. Moments of joy, distress, role model and border. As long as you can, take it all. Absorb the sharing. Hopefully we can follow through the experience of life.

Old age brings a thousand pain. Practice asking how our Mother's health is. Accompany Mom to the hospital when needed. Now everything is upside down. Remember us when we were small? How scared are we to see a Doctor? However, Mother's hand leadership calms everything down. Just like now. Our mother is like a terrified child, believe that she really needs a soul calm that we are her children.

The end of the word, let us not be children who do not remember our services. When we're in trouble, Mother among the first to put a hand out. Everytime we feel like being angry at Mom, think what we have donated to her? Is it the same as what we have ever received? If not, it's better to be silent than to say. Because our responsibility will not be equal. No matter how much gem gold is in the world, we can't afford to give Mother lives.

So much my heart nukilan about Mom. Hopefully can open eyes and mind.

Share this writing for more people's viewing and as a sign you love your Mother

If your mother is gone, pray and give charity through the benefits she has given and in her name. Hopefully this can help him in the afterlife.

Credit: Akhtar SyamirTranslated

【小兒關煞：落井關】（English writing below)
CHILD'S MISHAP OF FALLING INTO WELLS

「李小姐，命理師說我孩子有落井關，我該怎麼辦？」

最近有位婦女私訊問我，問了我以上的問題。

看孩子八字，尤其是三歲以下的幼兒，必須得熟知小兒關煞。若孩子八字中有小兒關煞，從小孩出生到大運前，父母都得格外小心。有時候，一些小孩比較難帶難養，是因為他們八字有小兒關煞。但如果為人父母不知道，就不懂有辦法化解關煞，在育兒的歲月中，便會增添了很多壓力和負面情緒。

當你了解你孩子的八字之後，對於他的需求和行為，你會多了份了解、包容和關愛，而不會認為你的孩子就是多災多難，比別人家的麻煩。你也不會因為不懂孩子的命，而覺得自己或伴侶不是個好家長，很倒霉，而因此常自責或夫妻之間有摩擦。

小兒關煞一共有三十六關，一般人會曉得白虎關、夜啼關和鬼門關等。我個人對落井關印象特別深。剛學八字時，我借了一些好朋友的八字邊算邊對照她們的遭遇。

有一位好友，八字正好就犯了落井關。小時候，她父母並沒有為她看過命，自然不知道她有此難。她是媽媽的第一胎，母親生性比較避忌，從小就不讓她接近海邊、游泳池，沒得學游泳，更沒讓她學踏腳踏車、去遠足或參加學校露營。母親一直擔憂孩子會遇到不測，而喪失生命。

大約她十一二歲左右，有一晚，她與父母外出回家時，走在一條熟悉不過的路上。不知怎麼的，她錯踏了一步，本來應該要跨過那深深的溝渠，她卻兩隻腳都陷了進去。幸好她反應快，雙手按在草地上，才沒整過人跌進去。那溝渠不是很寬，卻有點深度。除了手掌手腕都擦傷以外，她兩條大腿因為摩過溝渠的石牆，有十多條長長短短，如線條般的血痕。她爸爸把她扶起來時，她痛得慘叫連連。

最不可思議的是，同個意外在同個地點同個時間段，竟然發生在她身上兩次。第二次，她比較幸運。 穿著牛仔褲，因此只有一半的傷。可她卻從那時起，就不再走那條捷徑回家。

落井關，一般指的是水厄。看到孩子八字有此關，命理師都會勸父母，勿讓孩子接近井边、河边、水边等，要多加小心。但沒想到，我的好友卻是兩次跌進同一個有泥水的溝渠，只是在不同段。我研究了她的八字後，領悟到看八字不能夠背死書似的看。一樣的關煞，放在不一樣的八字，會以不一樣的方式顯化。這些都需要經驗的累積，自然就更有能力幫客人趨吉避凶。

大約五年前，師父有位客人生了孩子，急需嬰兒名字，卻沒更早約師父，碰巧師父的行程排得很滿。因此，師父派我去為他客人解析嬰兒的名字。我就一五一十把師父交代我的話，說給他客人聽，尤其是一些他需要注意的孩子行為。

怎知，說完後，客人一臉愁容，問我：「難道我孩子的八字沒有半點好嗎？」

我微笑著說：「當然有！只是一個良名本來就是要補缺一個八字的不足，所以我得先告訴您孩子八字裡的不圓滿，進而再解釋師父為您孩子取的名用意何在。如果你想要了解孩子八字的強項和未來，您可以請師父為他批八字。」

現在想想，不知客人會不會誤會我故意講這些警惕的話，是要引他來找師父批孩子的八字，賺他的紅包錢。😄

我回覆那位女讀者時，我鼓勵她向之前的命理師詢問。嚴格來說，要算準這落井關會何時顯現，在怎樣的地點，怎樣的情況，和什麽人在一起時，孩子會容易落井，會發生幾次落井，幾歲過後就不必擔心，父母除了小心以外，還可以怎麼做等等等，這些都得批八字。如果我隨意回答，也不夠專業，畢竟雖然我好友的腿上完全沒有之前落井的疤痕，但不是每個孩子都那麽幸運，嚴重的話，無論會不會游泳，還是會賠上一條命的。

奉勸各位鄉親父老，在生孩子前，多祈福、懺悔、修善，才能生出一個來報恩的孩子，而不是來討債的。如果在育兒過程中，遇到很多問題，如孩子頻頻生病、不肯讀書、禮貌不佳、叛逆不羁、親子關係惡化，我建議為孩子批八字及整頓他房間的風水。童年只有一次， 不要錯夠改命的黃金時段，改一句古人的話：賜子千金，不如教子一藝；教子一藝，不如為子改運

祝天下父母都能夠無憂無慮地扶養國家未來的棟樑。加油，爸爸媽媽們！

......................

"Ms Lee, a Master said my child would have the mishap of falling into wells. What should I do?

A lady reader recently PM me this question.

When analysing children's Bazi, especially for those below 3 years old, a Chinese Metaphysics practitioner must be well-versed in the Barriers and Disasters of Young Children. If the child's Bazi has such codes, the parents have to be extra vigilant from his birth time till he enters into his first luck pillar. Sometimes, it is extra tough work to raise certain children, because their Bazi have the codes of Barriers and Disasters of Young Children. However, if the parents are clueless about this, naturally they would not have the solutions to resolve it and thus, face a lot of stress and negative emotions in parenting.

When you understand your child's Bazi, his requirements and behaviour will start to make more sense to you. Instead of thinking that you gave birth to a live disaster who is more troublesome than other kids, it becomes easier for you to show more understanding, forbearance, love and care. At the same time, you will stop feeling unlucky and quit the self-blame + spouse-blame of being bad parents. This will greatly reduce conflicts between you and your spouse.

In the Barriers and Disasters of Young Children, there are altogether 36 of them. Most people would know of the White Tiger Barrier, the Night Crying Barrier and Gate of Ghosts Barrier etc. For me, I have an especially deep impression of Falling Into Wells Barrier.

During my early days in learning Bazi, I borrowed Bazi details of my good friends to hone my skills and learn more in-depth.

Coincidentally, one particular good friend has this Falling Into Wells Barrier in her Bazi. As a kid, her parents had never gotten her Bazi read, and hence, did not know that she would face this mishap. She was her mum's first-born and her mother considered many things taboo. During her childhood, my good friend was never allowed near seas, swimming pools and of course, never got to learn swimming. Neither was she allowed to learn cycling, go hiking or participate in school camps. Her mother worried that freak accidents would happen to her, taking away her life.

When she was about 11 or 12 years old, one night, while returning home with her parents, she walked on the very familiar route home. Somehow, she missed a step, and instead of crossing over a deep drain, her legs ended up plunging straight down into the drain. Luckily, she reacted swiftly and pressed her palms on the grass field, avoiding a full fall into the drain. It was not a wide drain, but it was relatively deep. Apart from abrasions on her palms and wrists, she also skinned her thighs against the drain walls, and there were over 10 long and short bloody string-like injuries on her thighs. She was crying in pain as her father pulled her up from the drain.

What was most unbelievable is that the same accident happened to her twice at the same place and same timing. During her second fall, she was luckier as she worn jeans and only suffered half the injuries as before. But since then, she never took that short cut home.

The Falling Into Wells Barrier generally refers to water mishaps. If a child's Bazi has this Barrier, the Master would advise the parents to be extra careful and not let the child near wells, rivers, and water bodies etc. It was unexpected that my good friend ended up tumbling into a drain that had muddy water twice, at different ends.

After studying her Bazi, I had the realisation that we should never analyse a Bazi just by rote learning. The same Barrier & Disaster code, when occured in a different Bazi, can manifest differently for different people. All these require accumulation of practical experience and the practitioner would be better in helping the client to avert disasters and pursue good fortune.

About 5 years ago, a client of Shifu just had a newborn and urgently needed a name for the baby. However he did not make an appointment with Shifu earlier and Shifu's schedule was full. So I was sent by Shifu to explain the chosen names to the client. I reiterated what Shifu told me to his client, especially behavioural issues of the child, which the client must take note of.

Just as I finished my explanation, the client asked me with a sad look on his face, "Isn't there anything good in my child's Bazi?"

I smiled, "Of course there are. But an auspicious name is meant to make up for the inadequacies in the child's Bazi. So I need to tell you what the inadequacies are and how Shifu's selection of name will help you. And as you pay extra attention to these areas in your parenting, your child will grow up to manage his emotions better and have a stronger character. If you wish to understand what his good areas are, you can seek Shifu to analyse your child's Bazi."

There are naturally good and bad in a person's Destiny. In my humble opinion, while good things will happen as a matter of fact, we need to pay more attention to the ways to averting or resolving the bad.

Now as I recall the incident, I wonder if the client misunderstood me for telling me those "bad things" as promoting Shifu's Bazi service. 😄

In my reply to the lady reader, I encourged her to clarify with her Master. Stritcly speaking, to predict accurately when this Falling Into Wells Barrier will occur,
its location,
the conditions,
with whom,
how many times the child will fall into the well,
from what age onwards the child will be safe,
apart from being vigilant, what else the parents can do...etc

All these require an analysis of the child's Bazi.

If I answer casually, I am not being professional. After all, while my good friend is really fortunate not to bear any scars on her thighs from the deep fall, not every child gets away lightly. In the most serious cases, whether they know how to swim or not, some children pay for it with their lives,

My advice for all my beloved readers, if you wish to give birth to a child who is here to repay you instead of a karmic creditor, pray for more blessings, do your repentance practice and cultivate more virtuous deeds. While during your parenting journey, should you hit a lot of obstacles, like children who frequently fall sick, refuse to study, have bad manners, are rebellious and your relationship with your children is hitting rock bottom, my suggestion is get their Bazi analysed and organise their bedroom Feng Shui.

A fruitful childhood only has one chance of happening. Miss it and it will be gone. Adapting an ancient adage: Instead of giving your son a thousand taels of gold, it is better to teach him a skill. Instead of teaching him a skill, it is better to help him improve his luck in life.

May all parents be able to raise the future of our nation, with no worry and sadness. Gambate!!!