關於 short-term financial goals ，我們在網路上蒐集到這些相關的討論、資訊與評價

[教育時評] 成長心態的十大必知 10 Must-Knows for a Growth Mindset

透過持續的完成人生的短期與長期目標，我們在探索和反省中逐漸了解自我，從而找到人生目標。擁有人生目標便可有效制定更明確的長短期目標，從而有規劃的活出自己想要的人生。

然而人生目標形成與達成皆需要經歷許多人生的歷練，制定相關的精準目標有需經歷探索，那年輕的同學到底要如何在尚未明確的現階段來設定目標?

每一個人完成探索目標的時間當然不同，過程中我們的目標也會不停的變動，甚至許多人可能一輩子也未必能覺察自己的人生目標。然而透過一個彈性的成長心態 (a flexible growth mindset)和他人指導，我們可以更有效率輔助自己建立和完成目標。

以下是我透過自身經驗，並參考近代教育理論與心理學，幫同學寫的「成長心態的10個必知 / 10 Must Knows」，以便更進一步的探討如何建立和達成自己的目標:

★★★★★★★★★★★★

1. Know what you want in life. While short-term goals may be ever-changing, you can start by having an overall sense of purpose or change that you want to make. For me, it was initially to have financial stability but eventually transformed to contributing to educational leadership. Having an overall purpose can help you align your short-term objectives with long-term goals, making accomplishing them far more efficient and motivating.

知道自己的目的。儘管短期目標可能會發生變化，但你應該對目標或要做出的改變有全面的認知。 對我來說，最初的目標是財務穩定，但最終轉變為對教育領導的貢獻。有一個總體目標可以幫助自己保持短期目標與長期目標的一致，從而更有效、更有動力地實現這些目標。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

2. Know that you can solve your problems and make changes in your life. While we all have different problems, and there is no guarantee we can resolve all issues, working towards a positive change will benefit you regardless of the outcome. You must know that you have the capacity for positive change.

知道自己有能力解決問題，儘管並不是所有的問題都能自己解決。每個問題都是成長和學習的機會。首先寫下問題，然後積極面對，並在有需要時尋求他人協助。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

3. Know that you can develop the skills and abilities you need to make changes through consistent effort and the development of your unique strengths. Everyone is talented in different ways but persistence is what develops talents into invaluable skills you can use to empower yourself and achieve your goals. We do not all need to be as talented as Olympic athletes to achieve the success we need in life.

知道自己可以通過持續不斷的努力和個體優勢的發展來獲得所需的能力。每個人擅長的事物皆有所不同，通過經年累月的工作和學習將自己的才能進一步發展為寶貴的技能。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

4. Know that consistently meeting small and realistic objectives that align with your bigger goals and purpose is the most efficient way to achievement. Do not try to accomplish too many things at once or your might not accomplish anything at all in the end. Set realistic goals that you can adjust and achieve a step at a time.

知道實現與長期目標相符的短期目標是達成人生目標最有效的方法。確定目標實現的優先順序，不要試圖一次完成太多的事情，否則最終可能徒勞無功。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

5. Know that achieving your goals take time and consistent effort. You must make plans and keep schedules to keep yourself from procrastinating. Do not think you can reach your end goal in a week and then be disappointed by your failure. Taking a small step each day will enable you to make great strides in life. You must also prioritize which objectives to meet first and have a plan for doing so. Consult your mentors, parents, and peers, have a discussion, and come up with your own plan.

知道實現目標需要時間和持續不斷的努力。制定計劃並表操課以免拖延。不要期待自己會在一周內達到最終目標，然後對失敗感到失望。每天走一小步就能使生活大步向前。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

6. Know that you may fail along the way, but every failure can bring you closer to achievement. However, know that failing only brings growth when you self-reflect and make changes. Do not just keep repeating mistakes.

知道自己可能會失敗，但是每一次失敗都會更接近成就。然而，只有自省並做出改變，失敗才會帶來成長。不要只是重複之前的錯誤。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

7. Know that role models, mentors, and teachers can take you to the next level. Actively seek out your role models and mentors and learn from your competitors and peers. Actively seek out talented and experienced individuals to guide you and work to earn their trust and guidance. Do not expect everyone to come to you and help you for no reason. Why should they? Be humble and be grateful.

知道榜樣、指導者甚至競爭對手都可以將自己帶到全新的高度。積極尋找榜樣和指導者，並向競爭對手學習。積極尋求有才華與經驗豐富的人的協助，並努力贏得他們的信任和指導。不要指望每個人都會無緣無故地幫忙。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

8. Know that collaboration will enable you to accomplish success on a much larger scale. Every successful person has a partner or a team behind them. There is only so much you can learn and do on your own, and you must work with talented and trustworthy people from every domain.

知道協作能使自己更大程度地取得成功。每個成功的人都有一個團隊。每個人精力有限，你需要與各領域的強者一起工作。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

9. Know that opportunities are created, not given. By actively seeking, learning, planning, and pursuing ways to accomplish your goals, you are creating new opportunities every day. Listen to advice but do not be limited by boundaries set by others. Take calculated risks and walk your own unique path.

知道主動創造機會，而不是被動等待。通過積極尋求、學習、規劃與追求實現目標，每天為自己創造新的機會。聽取建議，但不受限於他人所設的障礙。走自己的獨特道路。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

10. Know that helping others help yourself. When we aid those less disadvantaged, we are building a more inclusive, equitable, and prosperous community. Such a supportive community leads to the exchange of diverse ideas, collaboration, innovation and positive changes, all of which will help yourself. Medical studies have also revealed that helping others enhances our own emotional-well beings. By helping others, you are helping yourself.

知道助人者自助。雖然從不同的角度出發，但我們都能以自己獨特的方式對周圍的人產生積極影響，並實現自己的人生目標。

Educational Equity (教育公平): http://bit.ly/2NvyQR3

Eric's English Lounge 的宗旨與目標: https://goo.gl/fFUBWe

★★★★★★★★★★★★

Motivation to Learn 學習的動力: http://bit.ly/2RjscPb

How to Set & Achieve Goals 如何制定短期目標: http://bit.ly/2Rdi0aU

Growth mindset poster: https://www.openrecruitmentlimited.co.uk/fixed-mindset-v-gr…

★★★★★★★★★★★★

Sources

http://exploresel.gse.harvard.edu/terms/530

https://www.psychologytoday.com/…/in-helping-others-you-hel…

https://www.theatlantic.com/…/how-kids-really-succe…/480744/

https://www.scientificamerican.com/…/debate-arises-over-te…/

https://www.npr.org/…/angela-duckworth-responds-to-a-new-cr…

https://www.washingtonpost.com/…/the-problem-w…/&prev=search

Image source: https://www.openrecruitmentlimited.co.uk/fixed-mindset-v-gr…

★★★★★★★★★★★★

喜歡我這一系列的文章, 也麻煩按個讚留言「 I want to have a growth mindset!」越多分享我就越有motivation寫下一篇文章!

對Growth Mindset有興趣的同學也可以參考Alexander Wang 王梓沅英文的粉絲團喔!

★★★★★★★★★★★★

教育時評: http://bit.ly/39ABON9

[教育時評] 成長心態的十大必知 10 Must-Knows for a Growth Mindset

透過持續的完成人生的短期與長期目標，我們在探索和反省中逐漸了解自我，從而找到人生目標。擁有人生目標便可有效制定更明確的長短期目標，從而有規劃的活出自己想要的人生。

然而人生目標形成與達成皆需要經歷許多人生的歷練，制定相關的精準目標有需經歷探索，那年輕的同學到底要如何在尚未明確的現階段來設定目標?

每一個人完成探索目標的時間當然不同，過程中我們的目標也會不停的變動，甚至許多人可能一輩子也未必能覺察自己的人生目標。然而透過一個彈性的成長心態 (a flexible growth mindset)和他人指導，我們可以更有效率輔助自己建立和完成目標。

以下是我透過自身經驗，並參考近代教育理論與心理學，幫同學寫的「成長心態的10個必知 / 10 Must Knows」，以便更進一步的探討如何建立和達成自己的目標:

★★★★★★★★★★★★

1. Know what you want in life. While short-term goals may be ever-changing, you can start by having an overall sense of purpose or change that you want to make. For me, it was initially to have financial stability but eventually transformed to contributing to educational leadership. Having an overall purpose can help you align your short-term objectives with long-term goals, making accomplishing them far more efficient and motivating.

知道自己的目的。儘管短期目標可能會發生變化，但你應該對目標或要做出的改變有全面的認知。 對我來說，最初的目標是財務穩定，但最終轉變為對教育領導的貢獻。有一個總體目標可以幫助自己保持短期目標與長期目標的一致，從而更有效、更有動力地實現這些目標。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

2. Know that you can solve your problems and make changes in your life. While we all have different problems, and there is no guarantee we can resolve all issues, working towards a positive change will benefit you regardless of the outcome. You must know that you have the capacity for positive change.

知道自己有能力解決問題，儘管並不是所有的問題都能自己解決。每個問題都是成長和學習的機會。首先寫下問題，然後積極面對，並在有需要時尋求他人協助。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

3. Know that you can develop the skills and abilities you need to make changes through consistent effort and the development of your unique strengths. Everyone is talented in different ways but persistence is what develops talents into invaluable skills you can use to empower yourself and achieve your goals. We do not all need to be as talented as Olympic athletes to achieve the success we need in life.

知道自己可以通過持續不斷的努力和個體優勢的發展來獲得所需的能力。每個人擅長的事物皆有所不同，通過經年累月的工作和學習將自己的才能進一步發展為寶貴的技能。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

4. Know that consistently meeting small and realistic objectives that align with your bigger goals and purpose is the most efficient way to achievement. Do not try to accomplish too many things at once or your might not accomplish anything at all in the end. Set realistic goals that you can adjust and achieve a step at a time.

知道實現與長期目標相符的短期目標是達成人生目標最有效的方法。確定目標實現的優先順序，不要試圖一次完成太多的事情，否則最終可能徒勞無功。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

5. Know that achieving your goals take time and consistent effort. You must make plans and keep schedules to keep yourself from procrastinating. Do not think you can reach your end goal in a week and then be disappointed by your failure. Taking a small step each day will enable you to make great strides in life. You must also prioritize which objectives to meet first and have a plan for doing so. Consult your mentors, parents, and peers, have a discussion, and come up with your own plan.

知道實現目標需要時間和持續不斷的努力。制定計劃並表操課以免拖延。不要期待自己會在一周內達到最終目標，然後對失敗感到失望。每天走一小步就能使生活大步向前。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

6. Know that you may fail along the way, but every failure can bring you closer to achievement. However, know that failing only brings growth when you self-reflect and make changes. Do not just keep repeating mistakes.

知道自己可能會失敗，但是每一次失敗都會更接近成就。然而，只有自省並做出改變，失敗才會帶來成長。不要只是重複之前的錯誤。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

7. Know that role models, mentors, and teachers can take you to the next level. Actively seek out your role models and mentors and learn from your competitors and peers. Actively seek out talented and experienced individuals to guide you and work to earn their trust and guidance. Do not expect everyone to come to you and help you for no reason. Why should they? Be humble and be grateful.

知道榜樣、指導者甚至競爭對手都可以將自己帶到全新的高度。積極尋找榜樣和指導者，並向競爭對手學習。積極尋求有才華與經驗豐富的人的協助，並努力贏得他們的信任和指導。不要指望每個人都會無緣無故地幫忙。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

8. Know that collaboration will enable you to accomplish success on a much larger scale. Every successful person has a partner or a team behind them. There is only so much you can learn and do on your own, and you must work with talented and trustworthy people from every domain.

知道協作能使自己更大程度地取得成功。每個成功的人都有一個團隊。每個人精力有限，你需要與各領域的強者一起工作。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

9. Know that opportunities are created, not given. By actively seeking, learning, planning, and pursuing ways to accomplish your goals, you are creating new opportunities every day. Listen to advice but do not be limited by boundaries set by others. Take calculated risks and walk your own unique path.

知道主動創造機會，而不是被動等待。通過積極尋求、學習、規劃與追求實現目標，每天為自己創造新的機會。聽取建議，但不受限於他人所設的障礙。走自己的獨特道路。

★★★★★★★★★★★★

10. Know that helping others help yourself. When we aid those who are disadvantaged, we are building a more inclusive, equitable, and prosperous community. Such a supportive community leads to the exchange of diverse ideas, collaboration, innovation and positive changes, all of which will help yourself. Medical studies have also revealed that helping others enhances our own emotional-well beings. By helping others, you are helping yourself.

知道助人者自助。雖然從不同的角度出發，但我們都能以自己獨特的方式對周圍的人產生積極影響，並實現自己的人生目標。

Educational Equity (教育公平): http://bit.ly/2NvyQR3

Eric's English Lounge 的宗旨與目標: https://goo.gl/fFUBWe

★★★★★★★★★★★★

Motivation to Learn 學習的動力: http://bit.ly/2RjscPb

How to Set & Achieve Goals 如何制定短期目標: http://bit.ly/2Rdi0aU

Growth mindset poster: https://www.openrecruitmentlimited.co.uk/fixed-mindset-v-growth-mindset

★★★★★★★★★★★★

Sources

http://exploresel.gse.harvard.edu/terms/530

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/between-cultures/201805/in-helping-others-you-help-yourself

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2016/06/how-kids-really-succeed/480744/

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/debate-arises-over-teaching-growth-mindsets-to-motivate-students/

https://www.npr.org/sections/ed/2016/05/25/479172868/angela-duckworth-responds-to-a-new-critique-of-grit

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/answer-sheet/wp/2016/05/10/the-problem-with-teaching-grit-to-poor-kids-they-already-have-it-heres-what-they-really-need/&prev=search

Image source: https://www.openrecruitmentlimited.co.uk/fixed-mindset-v-growth-mindset

★★★★★★★★★★★★

喜歡我這一系列的文章, 也麻煩按個讚留言「 I want to have a growth mindset!」越多分享我就越有motivation寫下一篇文章!

★★★★★★★★★★★★

教育時評: http://bit.ly/39ABON9

交往時沒想到會和女朋友聊了這些話題，結婚時沒想到會和老婆一起把它寫成文章，出書時沒想到會將這個故事收入到我的自傳，總之，感情故事也是「失控」的一部分。

購買作者親簽書「失控，是最好的安排」： https://step30.org/single_product.php?id=19

註：所有版稅將全數捐贈非洲偏鄉建設

婚前討論題目

想象兩個陌生人在某處遇見，幾通電話和晚餐後，他們現在成了男女朋友。

他們喜歡在電話中聊天、看電影、逛街、親嘴和觸摸；兩人都非常享受和對方相處的時間。

不知不覺的過了幾年後；雙方也都差不多到達適婚年齡了，所以自然的他們轉向男友/女友，才驚覺他/她根本就不適合成為自己未來另一半的角色。

這時他們才發現自己卡在一段感情裡，不能前進踏入婚姻；因為他們對人生的期許非常不同，但卻也不能分手；因為雙方交往太久，兩人都太習慣了。

這種案例其實很常發生，在和我分享兩性關係的人當中，我已經一次又一次的在不同的人身上聽見相同的故事。

所以說與其等到要結婚時才想到婚前討論題目，我通常都鼓勵大家在交往的最前期(某些甚至交往前)就一起討論。因為交往中的親密接觸有時候會影響當事人看不見長遠的道路，所以如果雙方能在花上時間和精力前就事先討論這些主題，相信這對所有人都有幫助。

……………………………………………………………………………..

這裡有一些我想出來的婚前討論主題和題目，希望這些問題能啟發大家思考出更多更適合自己的討論內容。

雙方期待：會對兩性關係感到失望的最大原因之一就是雙方都帶著錯誤的期待。
1. 這段感情的目的是什麼？
2. 你覺得一個丈夫/妻子的角色是什麼？
3. 你想象中的完美婚姻看起來應該是怎樣？
4. 我們兩個的感情有可能會遇到哪些挑戰？

人生目標： 想象有一個人的目標是努力工作建立起價值千萬的事業和生活水平，而另一個人則是想要成為海外宣教士，奉獻出所有的金錢和時間生活在非洲國家。這兩個人的目標都非常好，但這是兩個完全不同方向的目標。
1. 你覺得你10年後會是什麼樣子？
2. 你的短期/長期目標是什麼？(個人、經濟、家庭、身體、精神、生活水準)
3. 你的伴侶在你的這些目標中扮演的是什麼角色？
4. 在什麼情況下你會改變你的目標？

信仰理念：對於某些人而言，他們的政治/宗教理念在生活中可能是非常重要的一部分。
1. 你的政治/宗教理念對你而言有多重要？
2. 你需要你的伴侶在你的理念中參與多少？
3. 你是否會將你的理念(儀式)傳遞給你的孩子？
4. 你的原生家庭有哪些政治/宗教理念?

生活習慣： 當一對情侶住在兩個不同地方時，這可能不是什麼大問題，但結婚後，你們大部分的時間都會跟對方在一起，而這些小小的生活習慣就可能會堆積成為大事情。
1. 你理想中最好的時光是該怎麼度過？
2. 你有沒有什麼隱藏的習慣是我不知道的？(要誠實)
3. 你覺得一個家庭中的責任大家該怎麼分擔？
4. 討論一下互相對煙酒、毒品、藥物癮或疾病的看法。

經濟觀念：這是一個夫妻最容易爭論的話題，與其遇到時再討論，不如事先理解雙方對金錢的看法。
1. 你的錢大部分都花在哪裡？
2. 我們將來的收入來源會是什麼？
3. 你的經濟目標是什麼？
4. 我的錢是你的嗎？你的錢是我的嗎？(婚姻關係)

養兒育女： 年輕的情侶要想這個話題可能會覺得有點遠，但相信我，這些題目在孩子出生後會更難想清楚。
1. 你想要在幾歲的時候生孩子？要生幾個？
2. 你想要教給兒女最重要的價值觀是什麼？
3. 你會怎麼教養你的兒女？
4. 夫妻是不是有一方需要待在家中照顧兒女？

原生家庭：當你嫁娶某一個人後，他/她的家人也會成為你的家人。
1. 你的父母在我們的關係中會扮演什麼角色？
2. 你喜歡/不喜歡成長中父母教養你的哪個方式？有沒有成長的陰影？
3. 你的家人是否保有某些我們一定要遵守的習俗？
4. 你的原生家庭中有沒有可能影響我們的遺傳疾病或紛爭問題？

Pre-marriage questions

Imagine two total strangers meet somewhere. A couple phone calls and dinners later, they are now seeing each other.

They like to talk on the phone, go to movies, shopping, kissing and touching; they enjoy hanging out with each other.

Years go by; and now they are at that age where everyone is getting married. So they turn around to look at their boyfriend/girlfriend only to realize that he/she is not suitable to play the role of their future spouse.

That's when they find themselves stuck in a relationship where they can't move forward and get married; because they have very different expectations of life. But they can't break up either; because they have been together for so long.

Stories like this actually happen a lot, I’ve heard it over and over again from the people who come to me about their relationship.

Therefore, instead of waiting until the time of marriage, I usually encourage people to go through pre-marriage questions at the very beginning of their relationship(some even before dating). Because the intimate acts from a relationship can sometimes paralyze people’s ability to see the bigger picture. So it’s a good idea to think about these questions before you spend years of your life with someone.

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Here are some pre-marriage topics and questions I put together. Hope this can inspire you to come up with more questions of your own.

Expectation: One of the biggest reasons for disappointment of relationship is because people get into it with the wrong expectations.
1. What is the purpose of this relationship?
2. What is the role of a husband/wife?
3. What does your ideal marriage look like?
4. What are some challenges we might face in this relationship?

Life goal: Imagine one person wants to work hard and build a million dollar business and lifestyle, and the other person wants to donate most of the money and time as a missionary in Africa. Neither of them are wrong, they are just two people with very different life goals.
1. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
2. What are your short-term and long-term goals? (personal, financial, family, physical, spiritual, lifestyle)
3. How do you see your spouse in relation to your goals?
4. Under what circumstances will you change your goals?

Belief: It can be political or religious, and depending on the person sometimes it can be a very influential part of their life.
1. How important is your political/religious belief to you?
2. What kind of participation do you expect from your spouse?
3. Would you want to pass on your belief(practices) unto your children?
4. What kind of political/religious belief does your family have?

Lifestyle: When you live in two different places, this might not be an issue. But the reality is when you get married, you will spend most of your time with him/her, and those little habits of life can add up to something big.
1. What is your idea of a good time?
2. Is there any hidden habits I don’t know about you?(be honest)
3. How do you think the household responsibilities should be divided?
4. Let’s talk about alcohol, smoke, drug or addictions/disorders.

Finance: This is one of the biggest subjects couples argue about. It’s better to talk about it before you run into it.
1. What do you spend most of your money on?
2. What are will be our sources of income?
3. What is your financial goal?
4. Is my money yours? And yours mine?(in marriage)

Children: This may seem a little too far to think about for the younger couples. But trust me, once the kids come along, these questions will be even harder to think about.
1. At what age do you plan on having kids? And how many?
2. What’s the most important value to teach your children?
3. How would you discipline your children?
4. Should one of us stay home and take care of the children?

Family: Once you married someone, his/her family will become yours too.
1. What is the role of your parents in our relationship?
2. What are things you like/dislike the way your parents raised you? Any scar from the past?
3. Are there any family customs of yours we have to keep?
4. Are there any family diseases/issues that can come into our relationship?